Eileen...

Another name for patience, beauty and class...

I miss her so as my days grow, i often think of what she would tell me now, as i operate through my days...

From birth, the first grandson, to much i was spoiled... the proud, flouncing & bouncing Eileen Forde, down the road with her spanking new grand boy child

She rode with me for hours i was told, stopping from house to house so they can behold!

Eileen, is Gran-ma, affectionately known...the woman that was there for me, where ever i go...

In boyhood days, she made sure i was ready for life, always making sure i have everything, giving me of her last, of her time, of her energies..."That's my bones!" she used to say. Encouraging me to make her proud, in everything that i did and say...

She took me to church, she dressed me for school, she fed me and fed me, trying to put meat on my flesh!..."Come drink this porridge boy, all de try i trying wid yuh! you still ain't puttin on a pound!"

Oh...how i missed those days, i'd come home from school, only to run straight to the kitchen, where i would have left Gran-ma from since early in the morning...it was scented with the aura of "goodies" plantain chips, mettai, buns...the whole works!...

"come boy, come help me wash up de wares!..." those words, i'd always remember, cause you had to know how to wash if you liked to eat!!

Eileen...a humble woman, simple in nature, very quiet in character...but don't get she vex...she would have your head...

Married to one man, treated him like a king, even when he didn't deserve rats' shit and all...patient woman, loving woman...the kind of woman that any man would want...ohh how i loved her so...

As my days went on, i started working...she sat me down and said..."boy your working now, you getting money, i want you to save...even if you got to give me to keep it for you...save ya money!" With her pointer finger in the air...and eyes over her spectacles..."and don't forget to give you mother and your father money...you would see your way in life!"

Words of wisdom, they would always flow from her undying fountain...

All mornings, i would awake to the sound of her righteous singing...such a lovely voice, although old an cracking, she would still give praise to almighty God, as she wobbled and clapped to her tunes...deep in her bible her nose would be, for an hour at least...then into her place of work..."the kitchen"

But Gran-ma knew to herself she was getting old, days would meet her in her bed very cold! age stepped in and sickness too...but what was Ol' Eileen to do!? Just the same! what she would do every morning...wake to sing her praise, bathe, dress and off to the kitchen...it was the thing that kept her alive!...

"Come boy, i getting ol' come cut up these things for meh!" she would always call me to the kitchen, to teach me to cook...especially when curry and roti was invovled..."if it was that fat one, he woulda got me talking and sendin up my pressure...nothing like you bones...nothing like you!...remarking to my lil brother, and grinning at her call name for me!

My watcher, my sister, my friend...i could tell Gran-ma anything...she would always understand me!...even when my own parents couldn't...Gran-ma was there for me!...In my time of need, in my time of gladness, in the times i was down, in the times i hadn't anybody to turn to...Eileen Forde was the constant in my life...she gave me balance...she gave me strength...she gave me advise, and she gave me praise where praise was due.

To watch my granny sick, was to take away my lungs and tell me to breathe...i couldn't stand to she her earthly body wither away...

I dealt with it all the wrong way, i wouldn't go to see her, although she was home...i would stay out of the house for late hours, when i know she would be asleep...or so i thought...i'd wake early in the morning and fly out of the house...

"Ya-pet!" she used to call my name; "what happen? i don't see you anymore!...we don't talk like we used to? what is going on?"...i looked her straight in the eye, to see the questions on her face, and the hurt in her heart...for she has missed her grandson so much...i had made it no easier on her, by running away and grieving about her sickness...she needed me, and i was no where to be found!

Days before i leave the land of many waters, to try the islands for work...i talked to her, telling her about the job offer, telling her what it would be like, telling her about the many things that i can do with the money...and how i would make her proud!

She counciled me, giving me mind etching advise, giving me the keys to open any door in this life..."Remember God" she said, "You see how he has raised you up!...and how you have grown!...i'm proud of you boy...you mek me heart glad, i don't know how long i would be around, but i want to see you walk down de aisle...and i want to see my first great grand...in wedlock!..."

We laughed at the whole thing that night, as we caught up on conversations that had been long missed...i gave her the regular kiss on the cheek, said my "I Love You's" and went to bed...

3 days after, my Gran-ma left...absent from the body...present with the LORD...

Life hasn't quite been the same...

I miss her so much...